Summer Has Arrived...

We ventured out to visit some friends at their lake house and check out the new boat this past weekend. Yes, I have lived in Texas my entire life and yes I know the sun can be brutal, especially on the lake during the hottest part of the day. That is exactly why the hubby and I stood at the sunscreen stand in the store for a good 5 minutes debating which brand and SPF we would purchase.

Everything started out great, a nice ride in the boat out to the island for a few adult beverages and mingling with other adults, sounds like fun, doesn't it? When we first got settled everyone pulled out the sunscreen and applied it liberally. I made sure to spray all exposed parts and didn't think twice about it. However, I guess I was more concerned about getting the residue on the new shiny boat than making sure it was getting on my skin. Now, see here in lies the problem, the wind was blowing pretty hard and we were using the spray on type of sunscreen. Can you see where this is going?

It was relaxing and fun, the perfect day! I took a short nap on the back of the boat, letting the warm sun soak into my extremely pale white skin. Although I did make sure to keep the towel securely around the bottom of my bikini since no one should have to see these baby birthing hips. Eventually I joined everyone on the beach and enjoyed yet more adult beverages and conversation.

After about 6 hours on the lake, it was time to head back to the house to clean up for dinner. It was only then, that started to realize the pain that was sinking into my skin. When I got back to the house to take a shower, I might as well have just ran into a cactus. The water was like a million needles being shot all over my body, well except the big hips, those had been covered. Then I gently dried off and put on my clothes looking myself in the mirror. I could see a patchwork of bright pink splotches. Nice. My forehead and nose looked like clown makeup gone wrong. Above all, the worst was the top of my feet. Not just pink, but almost a purple color. I think the adult beverages must have lessened the pain, because the next day I wanted to die.

Two days later I still can't put a shoe on either foot. My forehead is swollen with what appears to be a giant bright red goose egg. I am a hot mess, great! I hope everyone at the grocery store gets a good laugh.